Decidedly Obscure Human Complaints.

This month marks the ONE YEAR TRANNIVERSARY of my top surgery. The top surgery that, not too long ago, I believed was some far off, distant fantasy that I could never realistically attain. But, through years of patience, perseverance, and the support of the world’s most adorable friends and family, it actually happened. And my life has never been so swell. I’ve enjoyed my very first summer of not getting rashes under hot, itchy binders. I’ve enjoyed my very first summer wearing tank tops and sun bathing topless. I’ve experienced going into a locker room where I feel safe and can just, change my clothes. I’ve bicycled with a sweat-soaked spandex jersey unzipped down to my navel. I shared a dorm room on campus with three cisgender dudes, without fear. And, most importantly, I’ve looked at myself topless for the first time in 26 years without feeling the dreaded and painful sensation of a physiological disconnect. My brain and body just… connect. I’ve spent an entire year now just, fee...

Anonymous asked: Hey Dexter, I'm new to exploring my trans identity (just got my first binder in the mail on friday and have barely taken it off!) and am wondering how to talk to this with romantic partners? like what we can do so things aren't triggering? i'm more of a hippy/long-haired type of guy and most of the women i date id as lesbian so i'm not sure when and how to bring it up b/c i don't think any of them will see it coming. Thank you! Sorry for the delay in responding to your question. I have been slammed with research madness, and my poor blog has suffered the negligent aftermath. In response to your questions, I’m not quite sure how to respond because this has so much to do with individuals and their unique situations. For myself, I have chosen to express myself openly and freely, because being transgender is a proud component of my identity and experience. Through this approach, I either presume that potential romantic partners are aware and, if not...

Anonymous asked: I would like some advice if you wouldn't mind. I like this guy who I found out is FTM. I've never dated a trans male, and was wondering how to go about telling him I have this attraction? (I've never approached anyone, but I like him quite a bit) Also, what kind of girl would you say is your "type"/ do you have any current interests? Honestly, I would just advise you to tell him in the same way that you would tell anyone. He’s someone in the world who you like, so go for it! End of story! :) As for myself and my own interests, I have a hard time communicating about my “type”. I believe that human attraction is way more complex than we understand presently, so I try to limit my response to, “Whoever I’m attracted to.” - even though there have been some consistent themes (e.g. being female, femininity, compassion, etc.). I try to be careful about identifying a “type” because, as fruity as it sounds, there are a whole slew of amazing, beautiful i...

I fell head first into the stinky, deep dung pile of brown-nosing today. I never knew that brown-nosing could sink to such depths until my very first class of a brand new Fall semester this morning. I don’t know how or when I turned into Dwight Shrute. It just … happened. Maybe it happened the first time I watched a Youtube video about Pearson Correlations. Maybe it was the first time I rode my bicycle over wet leaves and had an epic wipeout while trying to woo someone. Who knows when, where, or why - but, it happened. Of course, as any diligent brown-noser would, I arrived on campus 30 minutes before class. I searched around for my classroom and then frolicked off to find ice for my water. On my way out of the building, down the stairs, and onwards to ice, I noticed someone with what appeared to be a really heavy rolling bag. I stopped and asked her, “Would you like help carrying this bag up those stairs?” Relieved, she told me yes. I carried the bag for her, then opened the do...