Be forewarned, this is a whimpery brief post, sent via a faint nearby wireless connection while a freezing cold snow storm out of nowhere rages on outside (sense the tone of gloom and doom yet?).
In a nutshell, today - well, ... sucks.
The biggest suck factor stemming from being told that severance would come knocking either Monday, Tuesday of this week or - at the latest - today. Unfortunately, I haven't received it yet, which I've been depending on to be able to afford hormones. My next injection is supposed to be tomorrow. Yet, I'm anxious about if I'm going to be able to or not.
I also haven't received any information from COBRA about insurance, so I have no idea how much hormones will cost being uninsured.
Sigh.
There's more to whine and whimper about in regards to snags with receiving unemployment, a disconnected phone, moving, uneventful job or apartment hunting, and feeling pathetic all around. Which then leads to letting more get to me that I generally try to feel hopeful and upbeat about; like feeling that I'm never going to be able to live a genuinely fulfilling, happy, functional life with such severe dysmorphia that just wreaks havoc on my esteem every.single.day. I feel ashamed letting it get to me - stress, worry. But it sneaks up every so often, and results in profanities and a little picked on party every so often.
In a nutshell, today - well, ... sucks.
The biggest suck factor stemming from being told that severance would come knocking either Monday, Tuesday of this week or - at the latest - today. Unfortunately, I haven't received it yet, which I've been depending on to be able to afford hormones. My next injection is supposed to be tomorrow. Yet, I'm anxious about if I'm going to be able to or not.
I also haven't received any information from COBRA about insurance, so I have no idea how much hormones will cost being uninsured.
Sigh.
There's more to whine and whimper about in regards to snags with receiving unemployment, a disconnected phone, moving, uneventful job or apartment hunting, and feeling pathetic all around. Which then leads to letting more get to me that I generally try to feel hopeful and upbeat about; like feeling that I'm never going to be able to live a genuinely fulfilling, happy, functional life with such severe dysmorphia that just wreaks havoc on my esteem every.single.day. I feel ashamed letting it get to me - stress, worry. But it sneaks up every so often, and results in profanities and a little picked on party every so often.
OH SAD!
ReplyDeleteI guess this means you didn't get my message about how I couldn't leave my door open today, huh, I hope, I hope, you didn't wonder over there to find out it was locked.
You can whine to me all you need, if anyone understand down and glum feelings it is I.
I heart Mel.
ReplyDeleteYou're doing great, all things considered. You've earned the right to feel mopey from time to time.
ReplyDeleteKegg: Ha! I did, I did. You're so cute. I feels glum no's mo!
ReplyDeleteAnd thanks Manna and Kammorremae. You two are the best, and most uplifting! :]
ReplyDeleteNothing wrong with days like that! I use to have ones that I would lock myself upplay sad music all day and cry like a baby! Got me ready to be all bad ass and uncaring the next day!
ReplyDelete